Moms to Happy Babies...please help

I know they exist. I just don't happen to be the mother of one. DS2 is 10 weeks tomorrow and hardly ever happy. All his reflux-colic. And milk allergies have been fixed. So why still grumpy??? Am I doing something wrong or is this normal??

He smiles and talks a lot right after eating. But after about 10 mnutes he is done. He will scream and scream till rocked backed to sleep. He refuses to lay on a playmat and look around or sit in a chair and be happy. Tummy time doesn't even exist.

What do I need to do to change this? Is this normal?? The crying is no longer pain cries....he is just pissed at the world for some reason?!?!?

get a baby carrier.
he's only 10 weeks old, still getting used to this big crazy loud bright world.
you don't need tummy time if you were to wear him in a carrier, as it strengthens the same muscles.

and playmats aren't really necessary until later on...
just hold him, go outside, talk to him while you're doing the chores, etc...

Exactly what Amba said. I would get a good carrier and spend lots of time outside. Jade never did "tummy time" and she had no developmental problems. I just carried her CONSTANTLY. She was happier that way, and I had GREAT arm muscles. :) I didn't have a carrier, but it would have been wonderful. She has never been good at entertaining herself, and hated to be in a chair or a bouncer. Now, she is finally learning to play on her own. I knew it would happen eventually. She probably checks back WAY more often than other kids, but I don't mind...usually. Don't worry that you are doing something wrong. Your kiddo just has his own little personality and it sounds like he is going to let you know what he likes and doesn't like. :)

These days everyone, and I mean everyone, comments on how happy and easygoing Lucy is. Well, the first three months I could not put her down for a second. So I didn't! I even went to bed at 8 with her and just laid next to her and quietly read.

I say just give him time, and hold him as much as he wants. I really think that built Lucy's confidence that she'd get what she needed.

The carrier is definitely huge. Sometimes he'll just cry in it, but if not immediately then eventually he'll learn to be soothed by it.

That said, it's also a personality thing. My 3rd child was (and sometimes still is ;)) more challenging in so many ways. He was such an unhappy child, although I didn't have a carrier then and maybe it would have helped. I couldn't get a sitter for him until he was 3 because he would non-stop cry until I came back. I literally would get just down the street and be called back.

:hug The good thing is that it can end up being soooo rewarding. He may have been needy, unhappy, and difficult then, but he is a super-sensitive soul with a really sweet heart now :D

I definitely agree with the previous responses. My son Lucas cried constantly unless he was being held or had physical touch in some form. He still prefers to be hugged and cuddled more than my other kids. I think that for some babies they just need that feeling of closeness to feel secure.

:yeah to Amba and the others. Sofia was super-colicky for the first 6 MONTHS of her life and the only time she was ever happy or stopped screaming was when I wore her, held her, or nursed her for hours at a time. Luckily, most colic goes away by three months, so if the reflux is under control, he will probably be much happier very soon.

Someone once told me that colicky babies grow into wonderful, sensitive, happy kids, and though I didn't believe it at the time, in Sofia's case, it's turning out to be true! So hang in there. :hug

10 weeks is still pretty new to this world and probably too soon to label the lil one as a lifelong grump ;-)
But.......I have a kid (who's name I wont use lol) who was born grumpy, had colic, reflux etc and is still a glass half empty kinda person. That's just them and I have learned to take the good with the bad. And there is good but you have to be paying attention or you'll miss out on it.

:yeah to Amba and the others. Sofia was super-colicky for the first 6 MONTHS of her life and the only time she was ever happy or stopped screaming was when I wore her, held her, or nursed her for hours at a time. Luckily, most colic goes away by three months, so if the reflux is under control, he will probably be much happier very soon.

Someone once told me that colicky babies grow into wonderful, sensitive, happy kids, and though I didn't believe it at the time, in Sofia's case, it's turning out to be true! So hang in there. :hug

I always have to agree with you because whenever I read about Sophia, I have to think that she and Indi are soul mates they are so much alike (on paper anyway):)

You've gotten lots of great advice!

Jacob was a dream of a baby. I could put him down, hand him off to someone else, whatever... he never cried.
When I had Lucy- I learned that Jacob was a freak of nature. She needed to be near me all of the time, and she cried and cried if I put her down or even handed her to someone else.
I somehow heard about babywearing when she was around 2mos old, and my life was forever changed.

Sam is not quite as needy as Lucy, but he still needs to be held a lot. Especially when he is tired. I just had to cook dinner with him in the moby, as a matter of fact. I tend to wear him out of habit while we're out, just to avoid meltdowns. :lol


I think a lot of it is baby's personality, and a lot of it is "I'm new to this world and need the thing that makes me feel safe- mommy!"

If you haven't tried wearing him yet, now is definitely the time!
The added bonus is that you'll have 2 free hands to play with big brother! :)

I feel your pain. Abby is the same way, only holding her usually doesn't help. She is happy for a little while after she eats (if she is not asleep) and sometimes when she first wakes up after a nap, but that is about it. The rest of the time she is screaming.

These days everyone, and I mean everyone, comments on how happy and easygoing Lucy is. Well, the first three months I could not put her down for a second. So I didn't! I even went to bed at 8 with her and just laid next to her and quietly read.

I say just give him time, and hold him as much as he wants. I really think that built Lucy's confidence that she'd get what she needed.
Pretty much the same story for my ds. After an exhausting first few weeks, I learned about attachment parenting, & I ended up with 2 slings, and 2 carriers, and in the end... a very happy, friendly kiddo.
:hug Good luck, and I hope you get some relief soon!

He sounds just like Xander. He had reflux and was super colicky. I couldn't ever put him down and he was soooo heavy! (born at 9 lbs. 10 oz) I tried every carrier out there and he hated all of them. I couldn't even hold him and sit in a rocking chair. I had to be standing and swaying or bouncing. The only thing that ever stopped him from crying was feeding him or running the vacuum. He started to grow out of that at 4 mos. and it kept getting better and better. He is almost 14 mos. now and he is always super happy. It was so hard for the first 4 or 5 mos. Oh the crying......I feel your pain. Hang in there....it will get better.

This happened in some form with all my children. With Victoria I was forced to let her CIO (Long story) with Elizabeth I did a partial CIO and hold action (didn't know baby wearing existed). So when Doug came along happy and content I felt a huge relief until about 8 weeks...and than I got a moby and carried him everywhere. Now at 6 months he still likes to be carried most of the day but he does have about a hour that he is up and will play on his own.

Yeah, I could NOT set Raemi down when she was little, really couldn't even set her down for very long at a time till she was ready to start crawling...she wouldn't even nap anywhere but being held or worn...so that's just what I did. I'd invest in a good carrier. Hope it gets better. :hug

the first 3 months are the hardest I think! I think there is a good chance he will be better with time!

Everyone always comments on how happy my son Tor is, and he sure is now, but up until 4 months old he had lots of crying periods; for him it helped to be outside or held or worn (I love my Ergo). He also had gas issues for the first few months, too. 10 weeks is still very young; I'm sure he is still adjusting to his world.